The Closet

December 4, 2025

Note: The Exhale Pro-Voice After-Abortion Stories collection features people’s stories of their experiences and emotions, exactly as they have written them in. We do not edit these stories at all, and the content that follows this message is exactly as we received it. We know that people’s experiences are complex, and these stories reflect the many emotions they may be feeling after their abortions. From relief to grief, and everything in between, and all at the same time, we’re here for you.

I wanted the closet. 

I wanted the small room in our house. 

A closet for me where my inner child could be healed. Where my makeup gets done and the trying on of clothes takes place infront of the big mirror. A place where girlhood at its finest shows. Skincare fills the walls, dresses hung and organized, shoes on the ikea shelves. 

I wanted that one room. The room that’s now my closet. 

3 pregnancy tests.

2 negative tests. 

1 positive on that third day. 

I wanted the closet. 

Is it selfish? Maybe? Yes? No. 

First home

First puppy 

First pregnancy? 

No. I WANTED THE CLOSET. 

I hated the mornings of sickness. The tiredness, the body changes that still aren’t back to normal, and knowing that room would no longer be mine. 

I wasn’t ready. I’m not ready. I wish I was ready. 

I cried in the closet that day. 

The day I knew I wanted to keep it that way and not make it into a room for another. 

The day that positive test turned into a negative I cried again. Not because I was ashamed. But because that room I call a closet will remain the same.

 Untouched.

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