Submitted by: Gizel

Hi. I had my surgical abortion just 2 days ago and I feel so sad and empty even though this is the choice I wanted to make.

I’m only 21, and with the pandemic going on and how the world’s going, I didn’t wanna bring a child up into this world. I originally was going to take the pill, but was a day late due to me unable to get a ride to my appointment, and changed the dates. So I was scared and terrified when I was told I would have to do the surgery instead of the pill. I wanted to cry and scream so badly but I said okay.

They were very kind and great with me through everything and talked to me through the surgery while I was sedated and it helped. When I got home I was a wreck when no one was looking. I couldn’t look myself in the mirror without crying. I felt so sad and alone. I know this was the right choice, but I didn’t realize how much emotional turmoil I was going to feel.

My boyfriend has been a great support at trying to make me feel better but at night I just can’t sleep and feel that sadness creep in again. I feel like I’m just rambling but i don’t know why I feel so sad for a choice I know I wanted.